GG Reflections is moving!

My dear followers,

I have decided to move to WordPress and continue my blog. It's being updated with a new, fresh look, and even has a new name now: Get Girly: Reflections on Christian Femininity

Check it out!

God bless,

Kristin

Finding out how the cookie crumbled isn't always that easy...

“Whatever weakens your reason, impairs the tenderness of your conscience, obscures your sense of God, or takes off the relish for spiritual things then it is sin for you, however, innocent it may be in itself.” - Suzanna Wesley

Last week, I put a few things into perspective with the help of a couple different events and was inspired to write again. It seems that over time, I learn that my experiences are actually worth something, both the good ones and the bad ones, because I can share them to help others grow.

There’s an inspirational skit I watched at camp last week to the song “Slow Fade” by Casting Crowns. The skit was touching, and I applaud those who worked to put it together, but it is the song they used that really got to me.

It's a slow fade

When you give yourself away.
It's a slow fade

When black and white have turned to gray,
Thoughts invade,

choices are made,

a price will be paid
When you give yourself away.

People never crumble in a day,
It's a slow fade.

How often do we not realize that we’re heading down the wrong road, when one choice leads to another, which leads to another? The cycle is endless, until you not only stop to realize where you are, but also to ask yourself “HOW DID I GET HERE”? Simply because it didn’t happen in a day, pebbles were loosed before the wall crumbled, and now, in order to make a stronger wall, the pebbles must be built back, but this time, we include some mortar...personal rules.

Now, this simple idea can apply to any problem that someone is dealing with, but in my case, as well as in the case of this blog, it applies extremely well to matters of purity, both of body and mind. My freshman year of college, I entered a brand new world, where I didn’t really HAVE to follow the faith my parents had passed down if I didn’t want to, but I thought I did...and I thought I wouldn’t have any problems being pure. After all...I was a good, Catholic girl. But that was my downfall, because I didn’t establish rules for myself to follow.

I went on to make a lot of mistakes, allowed myself to get led on, to be used, and to do things I would have never expected of myself. That’s how EASILY sins against purity can reel you in, that’s how SIMPLE it is. All it takes is one little step, and then another, and then another, and all of a sudden, you’re at the edge of a precipice...then what do you do?

When I reached that, I was devastated...I didn’t know how I had gotten there, and I didn’t know how to go back. But as I spent time going back through person, place, and thing, I discovered that, indeed, a person does not crumble over one day. Once I discovered my weakness, I set down some guidelines for myself. Ladies, no matter where you are in your life, and no matter what your experience has been with being pure, I can tell you that some of these rules should apply to every one of us.

1. No important late night conversations with guys. If it’s just chit-chatting or telling stories with a group of friends, that’s different, but NEVER put your heart on the line late at night. At night, our emotions are heightened, and tension is much more present than during the day. The more we open up and share about ourselves, the more attached we become...and at night, we’re just more prone to sharing much more significant things much more freely.

2. No texting conversations with guys after 10pm (or a set time of your choice). It sounds silly, but think about it...what good is being done in carrying on a conversation via text message late at night before you go to bed. It’s just asking for it.

3. Hugs...nothing more. If you’re not dating the guy, you don’t need to be holding his hand, laying your head on his shoulder, or sitting too close to them. One thing can very quickly lead to another when you start to get too comfortable.

4. Don’t bring up the future, vocations, or desires of the heart in conversation. Need guy advice? That’s what your dad, your spiritual director, or other men you look up to are for. That doesn’t mean you can’t ask a guy you’re close with for advice on how to react to certain situations or how to treat a guy on a date, but be careful wit how much you share.

5. NEVER, NEVER, EVER tell a guy that you have feelings for him. Let him take the first step. If you show even the slightest interest and he’s actually interested, if he’s worth anything, he’ll come after you on his knees. If he doesn’t take the bait, he’s probably not ever going to, and it’s not worth risking heartbreak over. Girls, princesses do NOT get rejected.

In the end, following these rules are tough. The list goes on for me, but those are more personal, and fit more to my own situation as well, but I would recommend trying to follow a few (or all!) or the rules above. Setting guidelines for yourself will help you to build a stronger heart, and, in the end, you will find the TRUE Prince Charming waiting for you on the other side!

Bare Naked

“O how beautiful is a humble soul! From her heart, as from a censer, rises a varied and most pleasing fragrance which breaks through the skies and reaches God himself, filling His Most Sacred Heart with joy. God refuses nothing to such a soul; she is all powerful and influences the destiny of the whole world...Such a soul is most deeply united with God. ...Now I understand why there are so few saints; it is because so few souls are deeply humble.” - St. Maria Faustina Kowalska (Divine Mercy in My Soul)

I’ve failed a lot in life, and with a lot of things. And I don’t like to admit it, but it’s true. Honestly, for me, the biggest obstacle to humility is admitting, to myself and to others, that I make, and have made, some terrible mistakes. And sometimes, merely hiding these failures causes problems with my relationships with other people and with God.

I’ve been blessed, this summer, with an incredible job. Working for a ministry called Hard As Nails, I’ve learned to take to heart the core values of authenticity, obedience, and courage. What’s the hardest of these three for me? Well, considering my pride and reluctance sharing my dirty little secrets...being authentic is pretty tough. Especially when there’s things you’ve managed to keep hidden for a really long time.

Now, this blog isn’t a confession, so I’m obviously going to spare you the details right now, but one thing I can say for certain is that the first step to being humble is admitting your failings to those who you’ve hurt, those who have trusted you, and those who can benefit from knowing that they’re not alone. Don’t be afraid to take that step to start healing the relationships that you might not even realize are hurting yet, and to help other people to realize that none of us are perfect.

There is something beautiful about sharing your heart and being authentic with yourself and other people. You become vulnerable when you allow yourself to be seen the way God sees you. It’s painful, and it hurts, but it’s like gold that’s been purified and turned into something that not only beautiful, but useful as well. We can’t be gold nuggets forever!

P.S. More to come...I pinky swear on that one.

Hide and Seek...never gets old!

“Love can work such wonders in a sensitive heart and what heart is more sensitive than Mine? Suppose someone were to ask you, ‘What are you doing at this moment?’, and you could answer, ‘I’m loving my God.’ Even if the whole universe were to stand still, it would be a fact of little importance compared with a soul striving to charm Me.” - He and I

Do you remember the game “Hide-and-Seek”? The one where everyone would hide, and one person got stuck being “it”, then the “it” person had to search and search for everyone else? Well, back in the day when I used to play that, I always got stuck being “it” because I was slow enough that almost everyone could make it to the base in time. So I would keep looking, and looking, and looking...

Fast forward 10 or 12 years, and here I am, still looking, and looking, and looking. Except that this time I’m searching for something a little bit more substantial, and a little bit more important. You see, over the years, I’ve discovered that God is not someone Who will just pop into your life and take over completely. You have to invite Him to come in and take over, and so we must begin by seeking Him out.

In order to really know God, we are responsible for searching for Him. Because, even though we are told time and time again that He will come to us in the silence of our hearts, we are the ones responsible for opening up that silence to allow Him inside. God desires nothing more than to love and love and love us, He is eternally giving of Himself more and more just so that we might say “yes, Lord...come into my heart, teach me to love You, fashion my heart to be more like Yours.” But we have to make that invitation of our free will before He can actually come in. Until then, He’ll sit right next you waiting for you to open yourself up to Him.

God has a specific way of finding you, of entering into your heart. It’s up to you to figure out how He speaks to you, and how He moves you. You see, some people hear His voice speaking within their hearts in real words. Others hear God through what other people say to them. Then there are people like me, who let God romance them through things like sparkly snow, sunsets, and beautiful flowers. I’m not saying that God can’t pursue us through different means, but each of us is different, and each of us will find Him in different ways.

To recognize growth in a life of faith is to recognize the way in which God communicates with us. He ROMANCES us, we just have to find it.

I choose You...or you...or You!!!

“We cannot love what we do not know.” - St. Augustine

When I was in grade school, I had to memorize bits of the St. Joseph Baltimore Catechism. “To gain the happiness of heaven we must know, love, and serve God in this world.” Recognize that? Now, through the years, I’ve always had that little sentence burned into my brain, and I’ve always been aware of the fact that you have to know, love and serve God, but to actually get it is a whole different thing.

We always talk about “being in a relationship with Jesus”, or discuss how He’s our perfect man, but He shouldn’t be something that simply replaces a boyfriend...He should be MORE IMPORTANT than any boyfriend you could ever have. He should ALWAYS be your ultimate Lover.

There is a huge difference between accepting Christ as “your Man” for a short term because you have to, and accepting Him forever through it all. I think that sometimes we don’t remember that Jesus is ALWAYS number one. He’s just the one who is there to fill that void until someone better comes along. He’s like a rebound man, where there’s no interest in commitment, but you want someone to listen to you cry about how much it hurts.

The thing is, that shouldn’t happen. Sometimes we get so caught up in the monotony that we let our faith become, that we allow ourselves to be swept away by all the wrong people. Romance with Jesus isn’t a one time deal, it’s forever! No matter what else, or who else, comes along, our hearts should be so wrapped up in God that we’re breath taken by Him continually, first and foremost. It’s like that saying “A woman should be so lost in God that it takes a man seeking God to find her.”...except if that man finds us, we have to CONTINUE to be lost and wrapped up in God’s amazing love.

A desire for ROMANCE

“Ah, you are beautiful, my beloved. Ah, you are beautiful, your eyes are like doves. Ah, you are beautiful, my lover, yes, you are lovely.” - Songs 1:15-16

Imagine that you’re day is coming to an end. You’re cranky, annoyed, and just sick and tired of the redundancy of everyday life. Quietly, your lover comes from behind you, takes your hand, and walks you to the hill behind your house (or dorm, in my case). You watch the sun go down, in an array of splendid, vibrant color, then sit there quietly while you watch the stars come out to sparkle in the vast night sky.

Now, just TRY telling me you didn’t sigh and melt a little bit inside thinking about that! And guess what, it could happen to you every single day if you let it. You see, there is someone out there who tries to take your hand every night, and He wants to show you something more beautiful than just any ol’ bouquet of flowers, and He wants to give you something more intimate and personal than a candlelight dinner. So He created the sunset, and the moon, and the stars. He created fields of wildflowers, majestic waterfalls, sparkling bodies of water. And He created it all for you.

You see, His way of taking your breath away is so much better than anything a mere mortal could ever dream of. He shows you beauty, and you KNOW that it is a gift from Him, and that He is romancing you in a way that no one else will ever, could ever, com close to.

I want to let you in on a little secret, our God...the same God Who created you, the same God Who you hurt every time you reject Him, the same God Who is your Father, your Brother, your Servant, and your Master...He is also your Lover.

“You are made for such a love. Your heart yearns to be loved intimately, personally, and yes, romantically. You are created to be the object of desire and affection of one who is TOTALLY and COMPLETELY in love with you...and you are." (Captivating)

Did you get that? God...GOD...is TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY IN LOVE WITH YOU!!! He DESIRES to sweep you off your feet, to take your breath away, every single day! He caresses you in the breeze, gives you hugs through the warm rays of the sun. He sends you gentle kisses in every falling snowflake. He loves you in an intimately passionate way, and He wants you to love Him back just as eagerly.

Start falling in love with Love, and see how incredibly He treats you. He’ll treat you like you are His princess, His queen, you just have to open up your heart and let Him in. He’ll do the rest.

I want to be beautiful...

"God endows Woman with certain qualities that are essential to relationships, qualities that speak of God. She is inviting. She is vulnerable. She is tender. She embodies mercy. She is also fierce and fiercely devoted...Tender and inviting, intimate and alluring, fiercely devoted. Oh yes, our God has a passionate, romantic heart. Just look at Eve." - CAPTIVATING, by John and Stasi Eldredge

I am a woman. Beautiful, passionate, emotional, incredible, faithful, enduring, strong, tender, loving, caring, and noble. I am a woman, and am proud to be one.

It’s hard to remember how amazing the beautiful gift of femininity is, especially when it’s being rejected and crushed these days. I see messages everywhere telling me that womanhood is something to be ashamed of, but not in a straightforward manner. We’re all told to “embrace our womanhood”, but in what way are we being told? Are we seeing this as embracing our gentle, humble, beautiful spirits, or are we seeing this as getting ahead of the men, fighting for what is rightly ours?

I know that’s where I get confused! Sure, I’d like to go far in this world, be successful, see things and go places, but in the end I know that my heart is searching for something deeper than just winning a battle. The search is for beauty, my beauty, your beauty, our beauty. The thing that makes being a woman beautiful. And what is that?

I wish that I could say that I knew exactly what it is. I wish that I could tell you the secret of being a woman and what it means, but I can’t. I think that it is something that each one of us has to discover for ourselves. We have to learn to find our beauty, not by being told by some man that we’re beautiful, not by another woman telling us how pretty our makeup looks tonight, but by something MORE than that, something purer, something (pardon the use of bad grammar)...GOODer.

Only GOD can fulfill what we are yearning for. Our hearts should belong to Him first, before anyone lesser. Our modesty should crown our beauty and allow us to shine a light of purity, or grace.

Learn to know that YOU are beautiful. Because He made you in His image...what more do you need to believe it?